Tag Archives: Divorce

3 Things to Think About Before Filing a Legal Separation

Filing for Legal Separation

Filing for Legal SeparationAccording to the U.S. Census Bureau, 2000, a total of 4,795,270 people in the country considered themselves separated. Breaking it down, there were 2,916,327 women and 1,878,943 men who felt this way. In a 2002 report, findings showed that nearly half of these people stayed separated for a year prior to getting a divorce, while 16% stayed separated for over three years.

Legal separation and divorce can happen at any point during one’s marriage. For some, they stay together for a long time before hitting the wall. There are those who see the light after only a few years, even months after sealing the deal.

There are things you need to consider before calling it quits. If you’re thinking of filing for a legal separation, here are some factors you need to take note of before calling a family lawyer in Colorado Springs.

1. Change of income.

This is especially important for individuals who are the breadwinners or main income earners in a household. If you change from a high-paying job to a low-paying job after the legal separation, it could be used against you. The court might see it in such a way that you’re trying to escape your obligation to support your children (if any). In cases like these, the court can rule that you need to pay for child support based on your former, higher income.

2. Time spent with children.

When it comes to child custody, the court decides on the parent’s level of involvement based on the time spent before legal separation. Normally, fathers spend less time with the kids because of work, especially if your setup involves the mother working from home. If you wish to become more involved with your children after legal separation, it’s wise to increase time spent with the kids.

3. Moving homes.

In many cases, it’s often the man who moves out of the house and looks for a different place to live. If there are kids in the picture, the father usually finds a place that’s both near his former home and his place of work. Of course, this isn’t always the case. There are some cases that the mother is the one who moves away. Before filing for legal separation, you need to think about the cost of your new living arrangements. Can you afford to support your children and support your new life at the same time?

There are many couples that separate because they need to deal with their own issues first. In some cases, legal separation is a prelude to divorce. But there are many separated couples who reconcile after a few years, as well. If you’re planning to take this route, consider these three factors first before calling your lawyer.

The Mere Memory of Your Soon-to-be Ex and their Bad Credit

Divorce in Greenwood VillageDivorce fuels all sorts of conflict between exes. Aside from the severed emotional ties, you have to worry about who gets the car and the kids. And to make things more complicated, you have shared credit.

Getting a divorce won’t change the fact that you co-borrowed a loan. Usually, exes divide their debt, regardless of who is primarily responsible for the credit. Each spouse remains responsible, despite the judge’s orders.

There’s more to credit scores than just predicting divorce, a blog from Divorce Matters claims. Unfortunately, co-borrowers will suffer if one of the spouses has defaults. Rather than face the bad end of debt, it’s best to assume responsibility for credit you owe.

Credit Scores and Sour Marriages

Divorce takes a big hit at your finances, especially on credit scores. For starters, expect your income to drop and struggle with current expenses because of the separation. Keeping up with bills becomes an extra challenge.

Also, most couples have at least one joint account before the divorce. Not paying the debt immediately results in one of the spouses claiming responsibility. There have also been cases of ex-partners committing identity theft, borrowing the other spouse’s information.

Close ALL Joint Accounts

If you don’t want your ex hounding you for credit scores, close all joint accounts as soon as possible. Closing all accounts before the proceedings makes things easier because it forces your former spouse to cooperate with you. Some banks might require primary account holders to close the account. If it’s not your name on it, you’ll need the help of your soon-to-be ex-partner.

Stressed, Divorced, and a Lousy Credit

When you’re about to enter proceedings, it’s natural to feel sorry for your finances, especially if you have bad credit. Fortunately, it’s not the end of the world. Like life, you deserve a fresh start.

You can’t change the past; it’s better to move forward by being responsible with bill payments and improving current credit scores. Recent updates have the best impact, so keep good accounts active.

Separations need not be the end of the world. By being responsible on your part, bad credit is nothing but a mere memory — just like your ex.

When Parents Divorce, and You’re Not a Kid Anymore

Divorce

Divorce While grownup kids are believed to handle the fallout after their parents’ divorce better than younger ones, they still face a unique set of challenges when they go through this ordeal. Most adult children are expected to take the news in a calm and accepting way, but it is actually more damaging than when they were younger.

Parental divorce hurts adult kids in a different way, with the majority finding themselves in different sorts of uncomfortable situations. It is normal to experience loss and bewilderment, along with guilt, anger, or suspicion that their parents just stayed together all those years for their benefit.

MatthewsFamilyLawyers.com reveals how divorce can be a lot harder on older children.

Questioning Childhood Memories

Grown-up kids of divorce find themselves questioning or re-evaluating their childhood memories.  When kids start to wonder, they might think that their happy memories were fake or devalued, even though they shouldn’t feel this way. This is because they feel that they are losing a part of a past.

The movie It’s Complicated gives a glimpse of how separation can affect adult kids. When lead characters, played by Alex Baldwin and Meryl Streep, revealed what’s happening to their children, they all cried. The kids later tell their mom how the news was devastating for them and how confusing it is to learn that their family might be rebuilt after a decade of brokenness.

When Kids Take Over

The worst part is, divorcing parents often turn to adult kids to vent their feelings or ask for advice. While it is normal for kids to be loving and sympathetic, it is actually unhealthy for them to fill in those roles. Parents should not treat kids as mediators, lawyers, or counselors; they are not responsible for guiding their mom and dad in the process.

Many adult kids are also pressured to pick sides and it is often difficult and painful when there are infidelity factors. This is a lot harder, as choosing one side can be viewed as a betrayal by the other parent. The tough part is not just the loss of the original family, but how it actually redefines other relationships within the clan.

Divorce affects kids, both younger and older ones. Parent should not underestimate its effect, as it can be harder for adult children. Embracing healthy boundaries and talking to a counselor or lawyer can help.